Friday 19 February 2010

Underachieving OCD-er

So there’s this show, on some random cable channel here, called Hoarders. Each episode shows one family’s home – absolutely teaming teeming with mountains of crap. It actually is pretty disgusting (to me), but that’s potentially because I am more prone toward OCD than whatever neurosis these poor folks suffer. Yep, I am much more likely to go through binges of purging. I love going through my stuff and jettisoning the riffraff. (Full disclosure: the only thing I can’t seem to really do this with is books. But my house, nevertheless, is not overrun by them.)

Here are two of my favorite quasi-OCD compulsive purges.


The refrigerator.
The fridge and I have a kind of fickle relationship. I like to go out and buy a lot of healthy food – fruits, vegetables, etc. – carefully stash it all in the refrigerator … and then forget about it for a week or two. By which time, it’s mostly not in a state for consumption and so I reconcile myself to a binning binge. To be honest, I like this one so much that I have been known to practice this on the work fridge.

The closet.
This one is harder. I feel compelled to bag the old clothes and take them to a charity shop. This means that I periodically pack up the unwearables and then let them sit in the bottom of the closet until I get sick of that. Then they get moved out to the garage where they again sit for a spell. Finally I get tired of seeing them in the garage and they get put in the back of the car … and after several weeks of maneuvering around them every time I buy my soon-to-be-tossed fridge-fillers, I finally take them to a drop off point.

Do you have anything that you actually like to clean?

Monday 8 February 2010

Not So Cute in the Wee Hours



I’d like to take this time to thank the industrious rodent who made the time to roll some kind of flora across the roof and back all night long. Not only did you wake me up with your antics, but you also drove the normally placid (okay, lethargic) Scout nutty (ahem) as well.

I’m pretending you’re a squirrel. For some random reason I feel better about this even though the outcome of your incessant actions is the same whether you were indeed a fluffy gray-tailed squirrel … or some other less beloved sort of rodent.

So, yes, thanks again for all of your hard work and dedication throughout the entire night, but now really, you must go. I’m sure I have some neighbors who would welcome your nocturnal ministrations and I would hate to think that I am hoarding the pleasure.

Thank you, squirrel, and good night!